Toddler beds in Ikea
Or A kids menu on Uber Eats
A child in distress in the aisles of a grocery store –
Instantly I feel a dissonance in the tone of my emotion
My heart pounds
My chest swells
Shame nips at my ankles
Trying to pull me back to hell
“Triggered,” I whisper firmly
Taking discomfort by the hand
I embrace the sadness
These remnants of emotions past
behave like a colloid :
When I release
They drip away like water
Eleven months
He had to remind me !
Eleven months
I suppose I have learned a thing, or two
Lean in
Let it flow
It hadn’t even crossed my mind
Because very day is so beautifully rich
With all the components that come together to make living
Wonder awaits me with every pause
This is all for me?
It takes me down to my knees
Forgiven, I remember
It doesn’t always feel possible
But I can choose to clothe myself in its harmony
Releasing and recovering
To make what was wrong
As right as it can be.
My babies – my heart throbs
“They are safe now,” I repeat, out loud
Because sometimes flashbacks are stubborn like that
The sky is the limit she said to me
And I saw even the sky open for me
Not a cloud to be seen.
